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Wikipedia:Peer review/List of Bleach video games/archive1

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This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because over the past week I've worked heavily on this article, and it was something that no-one was working on in regards to Bleach. If possible I was wondering about the references, they are mostly from the one source and I don't know if that's ok, and also what other information should be implemented into the notes section, unfortunately, there are few examples to use for video game lists, which is why I'm looking for more input. Thanks, Lightlowemon (talk) 07:45, 6 September 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Have you used List of One Piece video games for insparation? Its a FL and anime/manga related. GamerPro64 (talk) 22:50, 6 September 2009 (UTC)[reply]
Yes I did actually, as well as the Harvest Moon list. Thank you.--Lightlowemon (talk) 06:23, 7 September 2009 (UTC)[reply]

The only issue I'm finding is that dates needs consistency; most are like this "2009-09-02" when it should be "September 2, 2009" per Wikipedia:Manual of Style (dates and numbers)#Dates-Tintor2 (talk) 11:54, 7 September 2009 (UTC)[reply]

You serious? They were originally the second way and I could have done them the right way the first time, grrr. Anyway, I believe I went through and changed them all to their correct forms. Thank you. --Lightlowemon (talk) 06:24, 8 September 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Comments by Guyinblack25

[edit]

The list looks pretty good and should do well at FLC. The main issues I saw are prose related.

The lead
  • Rearrange for flow:
    "...based on theTite Kubo's manga and anime series Bleach by Tite Kubo."
  • Split into two sentences and trim/reword for flow:
    "The games for the most partprimarily revolve around the plot of the manga, following Ichigo Kurosaki and his friends, as well as his enemies, but s. Some games, however, do veer from the main plot and develop original..."
  • Don't know if there's really that much variety to the systems: two Sony systems and three Nintendo systems.
    "The games have been released on a variety of gaming systems, both home and handheld consoles."
  • Best to avoid repeating "include" like this.
    "...but has included other genres includinglike strategy role-playing games and..."
  • All instances of "Bleach", video game or otherwise, should be in italics per Wikipedia:Manual of Style (titles).
  • The last two paragraphs are short enough that they would benefit from combining into one larger paragraph.
  • Games are either "ported to" a location or "localized for" a location. Localized is probably the best term here though:
    "...though Sega has directly portedlocalized the first Wii game, and the first three Nintendo DS games for North America, Australia and Europe."
  • I'd paraphrase the quotes. The punctuation in them throws off the flow of the content.
List
  • The notes sentences need to be consistent in their structure. Either make them all incomplete sentences without periods or complete sentences with periods. For example:
    • An incomplete sentence should not have a period: "Features one stage and six playable characters from the Bleach series."
    • A complete sentence should have a subject: "The game features one stage and six playable characters from the Bleach series."
    • This one is already a complete sentence and needs no change. "Hanatareshi Yabou was developed by SCEI."
    • This one is an incomplete sentence and needs either a subject added or the period removed. "Rereleased on October 25, 2007 as "Bleach: Hanatareshi Yabou (PlayStation 2 the Best)" in Japan."
  • The structure is more complicated than I've seen in other lists, but it is still functional and organized. Should be no issue.
Sources
  • For a list like this, yes, the majority of refs coming from one source is fine.
  • Any all capitalized words in the ref titles should be standard case. For example, SEGA → Sega and BLEACH → Bleach.
  • The sources look to be reliable.

Keep up the good work. Good luck at FLC. (Guyinblack25 talk 16:04, 14 September 2009 (UTC))[reply]

I think I went through and fixed everything, if you wouldn't mind could you please check, good work on the Kingdom Hearts articles by the way, you have quite a track record. --Lightlowemon (talk) 12:52, 15 September 2009 (UTC)[reply]
I gave the sentences a quick sweep. Feel free to change some of the wordings around to your tastes though.
A few more things I noticed:
  • Is there anything notable about Bleach DS 4th : Flame Bringer? Something needs to go in the notes section.
  • The only other suggestion I have is to cut down on some of the linking. Like in the "Bleach: Blade Battlers" section, PlayStation 2 only needs to be linked for the first instance. All others after that in the whole list can be plain text. Same thing with "Bleach DS", only the first instance of Nintendo DS needs to be linked.
Other than that, the list looks good to go. Hope you do more like it in the future. (Guyinblack25 talk 15:04, 15 September 2009 (UTC))[reply]
Thank you very much for that, I added a note to Bleach DS 4th : Flame Bringer, but I also had to remove one from Bleach Soul Carnival 2, I looked for a source to replace it, but there is next to no news releases on it considering all that has been seen/announced is a clip at the end of Bleach: Heat the Soul 6, and even that I can't find a reliable source. I also went and cut out all second links in each section, the article looks really bare now. --Lightlowemon (talk) 08:25, 16 September 2009 (UTC)[reply]
Since SC2 was announced recently, there's not much that can be done. Just keep an eye out and add stuff as you find it. I'm sure the reviewers at FLC would understand because the game isn't even out yet. (Guyinblack25 talk 15:12, 16 September 2009 (UTC))[reply]
Ok, then thank you very much again for all your help. --Lightlowemon (talk) 07:42, 17 September 2009 (UTC)[reply]