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Talk:The One with the Embryos/GA1

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GA Review

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Reviewer: Gen. Quon (talk · contribs) 16:01, 3 April 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Issues:

  • Generally, footnotes aren't need in the intro. I'd move [1] to the infobox or reception and [2] to the reception section as well
 Done
  • Intro: "agrees to host in her uterus the artificially inseminated embryos" Maybe it's just me, but this sentence sounds kinda funny. Maybe mention something about being a surrogate mother
 Done
  • Plot: "who knows more about whom" I would put a ':' after 'whom' instead of a comma
 Done
  • Plot: Change 'favourite' to 'favorite' since Friends is an American sitcom, the spelling should follow American guidelines
 Done
  • Plot: "As the four pack up their respective apartments; Rachel in particular displeased about having to switch" You should only use a semicolon when there are two independent clauses. The first clause is a fragment, so maybe rephrase to "As the four pack up their respective apartments—Rachel in particular displeased about having to switch—"
 Done
  • Production: Maybe spice this up with a fun free image. Maybe add this picture of Lisa Kudrow and mention how her actual pregnancy inspired the episode?
 Done
  • Production: Cite who directed/wrote the episode (A episode cite would be lovely)
 Done
  • Production: "It was the same with Debra Jo Rupp, who was..." Change this to "A similar situation occurred with Debra Jo Rupp, who was..."
 Done
  • Production: "The animals were originally intended for one episode but the producers believed as they got "so much mileage out of them", it made a recurring appearance." Change to "The animals were originally intended for one episode but because the producers believed they got "so much mileage out of them", they made recurring appearances."
 Done
  • Reception: The tenses change: ""The One with the Embryos" is Courteney Cox and Matt LeBlanc's favorite episode of the series," "Cox likes the episode," "LeBlanc spoke fondly of the pace" I would recommend changing all the tenses to past, as the action has already happened
 Done
  • Reception: "Thanks to the trivia contest alone, Embryos is quite possibly Friends' finest moment" Un-italicize "Embryos," since its the name of an episode
 Done
  • Reception: Change "It singles out..." to "The article singles out..." Sounds a little nicer, IMHO
 Done
  • References: Add Publish date for No. 3 and 7
Not sure, isn't '17 October 1997' and '21 January 1998' the published dates? -- Lemonade51 (talk) 11:02, 6 April 2012 (UTC)[reply]

That's all. Nice article; fun to read. On hold for seven days.--Gen. Quon (talk) 21:32, 5 April 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Oh, yeah sorry about the reference goof. Everything looks wonderful! I pass!--Gen. Quon (talk) 16:03, 6 April 2012 (UTC)[reply]